Waiting for Good
by anais117
Summary: A personal account of Katniss' life as she recovers from the trauma of being a foster child to the Snows and how she navigates recovery through therapy and help from her friends. Modern AU Contains Everthorne, Joniss, and eventual Everlark. Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games. (Formerly the story Our Time and reposted with edits.)
1. Chapter 1

Hello Everyone! I haven't posted anything new in a little while so I decided to dig into my archives of old stories and revamp one of them. After a few inquires on Tumblr on the page Everlarkficquestions, I decided to edit and repost my old story, Our Time. I changed the title and went through the chapters changing different things here and there. The plot will be the same as you remembered it if you read it back in 2012. If you're new, thanks for checking out my story! I hope you like it.

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Chapter 1

_1995: Katniss 13 Prim 14_

"What happened?" I ask Prim as I watch her pack her things into a small suitcase in the room that we share. "Mrs. Snow said you were leaving."

"Yes Katniss I am. I can't stay here anymore, and I can't talk about what happened either. It's just they didn't believe me anyway so the agency and the Snows want me gone." I sit there on my bed defeated not completely understanding what is going on.

Prim and I have been living in this foster home since we were 9 and 10 years old. Soon after we arrived, Rue came and then the two boys, Rory and Vick. Rue is withdrawn and doesn't talk much to us; she's 17 and I suspect it's just the age difference. Rory is 6, Vick is 4 and the only interaction I have with them is when I'm getting them ready for school, helping them with their homework, and giving them baths before bed. The three oldest in the house split the household duties since Mrs. Snow decided we have to be her live in help in exchange for living where we do. We are in a suburb of New York City on Long Island. It's a great area with good schools, and we live in a big house; something we definitely would not be afforded if we were placed in the city like most foster children are. We were living in Upper Manhattan and were placed when our mother was caught selling drugs out of our public housing apartment. They took the both of us from school and after spending three months in an emergency home, we were brought out here to the "country" to live.

The first Christmas we lived here they gave us lots of gifts and I thought our life would better from now on; eating three meals a day, actually going to school, having two parents, and most of all getting to take bubble baths every night. That fantasy was short lived when the abuse started. Mrs. Snow yelled at us anytime she could get and often told us we would end up like our mother being hooked on drugs and selling our bodies. Mr. Snow would call us "stupid" and other disparaging names along with having sexually inappropriate conversations with us. He never touched me other than having me sit on his lap, but it still was enough to make me feel uncomfortable. I'm in the dark about what happened with Rue or Prim though because they don't talk to me about it. I only know what I've seen him do and it's mostly the same as what he's done to me.

The Snows are short tempered with Rory because he has a learning disability as well as a stutter, and they hit and punish him way more than any 6 year old I've known. Vick is the favorite because he is the youngest and they got him when he was a baby.

"You can't leave," I tell her, the tears welling up in my eyes. "I'll be alone."

"I'm sorry," she replies. "You'll be okay. We'll still see each other, I promise. I'm just going to Nassau County." She comes over and gives me a hug and I cry into her shirt. I've never been away from my sister and she's the only good thing I remember about our life with our mother.

That Sunday I go unwillingly to church with the Snows; apparently they put on the front of being good Christians and they like to push that fact by showcasing us, their poor foster children who would have otherwise been in a group home or worse. The church we go to is in Brooklyn and I'm always afraid of being here. One because Mrs. Snow always likes to tell me how dangerous this part of Brooklyn is, and two because of the religious guilt I feel they teach us here.

After Prim left on Friday, I haven't been able to sleep. I have no appetite and when I do eat my stomach is always upset. The only good thing about coming here is that I get to see Gale. He's older than me by 4 years and I think at one time he dated Rue, but I like his company none the less. His family has been friends with the Snows for years so often after service we find ourselves in his parent's house. Usually I'll go there early bringing Rory and Vick with me and we just talk about random things.

"What happened with Prim?" He asks as I sit down in the living room watching the boys play. He places his hand around my waist running circles on my side; another plus about hanging around with him, he touches me. I guess I'm at the age where I should be dating someone or at least kissing but no one gives me a second glance at school. The small amount of physical attention I get from Gale is what I crave and is enough to tide me over until I see him again. It's never more than light touches on my back, side or arms. He's certainly never kissed me, but I know it will eventually lead somewhere; probably when I'm older.

"I'm not sure; they wouldn't give me the details. They moved her to Nassau Country. I'll probably get to see her next month."

"Do you miss her?" Gale continues his ministrations.

"Of course. It's lonely in my room now and Rue doesn't speak to me." At this moment Rue was at church in choir practice. After a hard first few years she's finally complied with them by joining the church. I won't though; I have too many unanswered questions.

"I hope you do." He stands up and his hand drifts up my back as he does and I feel a tingling sensation go down my back. "I'll be back, just going to call my mother to see if we're ordering dinner or if we're heating up something." I nod and settle back down into the couch.

_1996: Katniss 14 Prim 15_

Rue is graduating from high school this weekend and the Snows are planning a party for her here at the house. They will be inviting church family and friends as well as Prim. I'm so happy because I haven't seen her in nearly 6 months and the phone calls and letters we exchanged are always monitored. I hate that even with her gone they still feel the need to try to keep an eye on her. Apparently whatever Prim said that got her kicked out, it made its rounds at the church and Mr. Snow hasn't been back there in months.

Prim arrives in the afternoon with her foster mother, Ms. Trinket, an eccentric woman but a very good foster mother. I've been invited to their house several times to stay over but of course Mrs. Snow makes up an excuse why I can't. I think she hates how nice she is to us because deep down she thinks we deserve to be treated worse than crap because of our situations. I should be grateful for all she's done and she makes sure to tell me how ungrateful I am when I don't smile ear to ear when she does stuff she's supposed to do for me, like feed me and do the laundry.

I somehow grab Prim and bring her up to my room where I try to have a quiet conversation with her out of air shot of the party downstairs.

"How have you been?" I hug her eagerly. She looks a lot better than when she was here. Ms. Trinket actually gives her the money we get from the foster care agency and she bought herself some nice clothes, jewelry and make-up. My foster mother goes to the cheapest clothes store possible and buys me skirts that are way too long because she's "religious", and if she does buy me pants, they're boy pants because they are cheaper. I'm not allowed to wear makeup or jewelry for the same reason she wants me in skirts all the time. She pockets the rest even though they are already well off financially. It's a bit depressing to be living with rich people but still be poor.

"I'm doing great. I met someone." She goes on to tell me about a guy she is dating and that she's planning on going all the way with him. It's amazing how in a year she is happy to the point of being able to think about what most normal teenagers are thinking about. I think about being left with the boys when Rue leaves, and having to continue to take care of them while the Snows sit back and relax. Mr. Snow might eventually advance with his inappropriate sexual behavior, while Mrs. Snow will continue to berate me to the point of hating myself even more.

That August we bring Rue up to college and for one day I get to enjoy walking about a college campus and smell the nature that is around it. I've always had a thing for being outside and when I was little and lived in the city all I would see were too many people, drug dealers, and of course crime. When we moved to Long Island, everything was quiet and I would sneak outside in the backyard to smell the chimneys and listen to the crickets. This was a sight I've never experienced where I was born and I made sure to make the most of it whenever I could.

_1999: Katniss 17 Prim 18_

Prim is graduating high school and got a full scholarship to a state college to study nursing. I'm so proud of my sister and all of her accomplishments the last few years. She had a rough start that she didn't tell me about right away, and now she is number 7 in her class. Back when she was 15, the guy she was dating was abusive and it led her down a path where she became depressed and eventually tried to commit suicide. Ms. Trinket was devastated and got sick herself over the ordeal. After much healing, Prim promised her foster mother that she would be the best she could and wouldn't let her down again.

I arrive at the party with just Mrs. Snow. After the incident with Prim a few years back, Mr. Snow doesn't go out publicly, just to his job. Rory and Vick were adopted two years ago and recently Mrs. Snow has decided to take in some younger children; babies, if any arrived. I've been able to cope better with my situation by throwing all my energy into spending time outside and writing. Whenever I'm not cleaning the house or doing my homework, I walk outside in the backyard and sit on the bench they have out there and lose myself in my notebook. I still go with Mrs. Snow to church and I blend in with the pews because I refuse to participate. She does get mad with me and punishes me by not buying me clothes or making comments about my mother, who recently told us she contracted HIV from her drug use. What a wonderful woman my foster mother is.

Gale and I have become closer and have taken things a little bit further. We kiss now and his hand goes under my shirt, but no sex. It's interesting being with him because I don't think about my problems or my general fear of most other men that has been developing since my encounters with Mr. Snow. It's confusing but I just try to go with it, knowing I can trust Gale and that he wouldn't do anything I wasn't ready to do.

Prim is in a navy dress and her hair in curls at her graduation party. All of Ms. Trinket's family is there as well as one of Prim's friends who she refuses to acknowledge as her boyfriend. His name is Cato and he has blond hair and blue eyes like her. When they are together they smile and seem so happy. I try to enjoy myself but recently my anxiety has increased with working two jobs this summer. It seems my foster parents are both on high when it comes to their abuse lately, so if I'm not crying from being yelled at or rolling my eyes at another nasty comment, I'm feeling my stomach hurt.

During a doctor's appointment I told my doctor about my stomach issues and of course they assumed I was pregnant; you know since I'm in foster care and I couldn't possibly have a real illness that wasn't caused from laying on my back.

I look on as I watch my sister enjoy her party and be so effortlessly social with her guests. I'm not good at talking to people and decide to sit on the side lines picking at my food. When it's time to go, Mrs. Snow tries to act as pleasant as possibly around the family but as soon as she gets in the car and we drive off she starts.

"Your sister looked so pretty today. How is it possible you two have the same parents? Look at your hair, you only keep it in that dirty looking braid and it looks like you're gaining weight again. I would be embarrassed to be seen with you if I was Prim." I turn my head looking out the window trying to hold in my tears and I hear Mrs. Snow scoff at me. That night I take a few extra ibuprofens for my headache hoping I don't wake up in the morning.

_2000: Katniss 18 Prim 19_

I'm graduating high school and it's finally over. The Snows are kicking me out and I'm moving to another foster home in Brooklyn. While I'm afraid of the new surroundings, I'm happy I won't have to deal with them anymore. I've been here 9 years and all they've done is make me feel like I'm the worst person on earth. I've struggled with eating disorders, depression, and the advances of the bastard that is Mr. Snow. I'm going to attend a community college in the city that my social worker managed to get me in at the last minute, and my life is going to change. I'm hopeful of that.

When I arrive to my foster home in Brooklyn, I am met by a woman named Sae Charles. She's an older lady and mostly has teenagers in her house. I'm the oldest she has living with her and she surprises me by giving me a basement room with my own entrance. The other girls are instantly jealous at me having much more freedom than them, but the short of it is, I'm in college and most of them barely attend high school. Sae trusts me without even knowing me and that improves my self-esteem immensely.

My first day in Brooklyn, Sae brings me to a store where she buys a mattress for my bed as well as gives me money from the emergency check she received for my arrival. She tells me that she gives the girls their money every month and we can do what we will with it. We are expected to buy what we need out of it, other than food since that is her responsibility. I'm almost nervous not ever been trusted with my own money but smile at her and decide I just need to take it easy.

A few weeks later, I meet up with Gale and he takes me out to a movie and dinner as well as to show me around. I'm nervous because for the first time I know I'm not being watched and it has turned me into a spontaneous creature. I make out with Gale in the movie theater and even dry hump when we are alone in the elevator exiting the theater. This is so unlike my usual self. I manage to sneak him into my room that night, and luckily the other girls in the house are already in bed, so I don't have to worry about us being disturbed. He's starts kissing me almost as soon as I lock the door and pull the shades. He leads me over to the bed where he sit down, breaking the kiss.

"It looks like we can finally do some of those things we've been hinting at over the years now that you're 18 and we're alone." He smiles shyly and I know I'm blushing.

"Okay," and I lean in to kiss him. Gale gently pulls up my shirt over my head and I do the same to him. He kisses my neck trailing kisses to my breasts, freeing them from my bra and then going lower to my nipple. I moan softly not wanting anyone who could be in the hall to hear.

Gale sits up and takes down his pants and I do the same watching his groin. I've never seen that part on him but I felt it against my body many times when we dry humped. I sigh as I lay back down completely naked and he hovers over me.

"I just want to try some things first to warm you up," he says smiling. I'm completely nervous but I let him take over. Obviously he's more experienced than I am, I've never even masturbated. Gale spreads my legs and while he goes back to kissing my breasts, he rubs my clitoris and I nearly sit up at the sensation.

"Just relax," he coos and I try to ease back down

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"I've never been touched there," I look at him wide eyed.

"Do you trust me Katniss?" He lifts his eyebrows as he talks.

"Ye-yes, I do." I stutter, more nervous than anything.

"Okay then. Just relax. I'll go slowly." I lay back down parting my legs for him and he goes back to touching me. His ministrations are slow and he targets my nerve with precision. Soon after I feel a finger, then two, slip in and I tense up. He smiles but continues to suck on my neck and let his fingers do the work. I close my eyes to try to enjoy the sensation and somehow he hits something and all I can say is, "Oh my God," in a strained voice. He's found my g-spot apparently and he keeps targeting it until I push his hand away.

"Too intense?" He asks and I nod at him. Gale lays down beside me now and takes my hand, bringing it down to his shaft. Still lost, I sit up and grip it. He covers my hand and I slowly go up and down, leaving him to groan lowly and close his eyes. After a few minutes of this and the head of his penis leaking fluid, he reaches for a condom and instructs me to lay back down. He positions himself over me and asks me one last question.

"Are you ready?"

"Yes," I say even though I'm shaking. I want to do this after so many years of being sexually teased by him. I'm an adult now so it's time.

Gale positions himself and I close my eyes. He gently pushes in and even though it's uncomfortable it's not as painful as I would have expected.

"It doesn't hurt much," I breathe out.

"I prepared you," he responds, holding up his fingers which are stained with blood. He must have broken my hymen with his fingers so it would hurt less when he entered me. I'm silently happy by this since I've heard about horror stories from the girls I live with. We don't speak much, but when it came to sex, they seemed to never shut up.

Gale continues on and I try to enjoy the sensation of him inside of me but somehow I'm preoccupied. I start to feel him tremble and then he collapses on me. He pulls out and rolls over next to me.

"Catnip I can't stay too long. The trains are terrible at night." I frown and he looks at me. "Don't worry I'll see you soon. I'm not going to run away now that we've had sex. We're good friends right? Maybe more?" I don't answer him because I'm not ready for a relationship but the other stuff I can do with him. Oddly my feelings don't change for him; I don't fall in love with him because he was my first. I just maintain my life as before.

Soon after my encounter with Gale, I do continue on living my life. I start my college classes and meet new people. I still see him from time to time; mostly for movies and sex, but I've started using email and we talk on that frequently. Prim is doing great in college and of course is at the top of her class. My life is starting to look up and finally it feels good to be hopeful.

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Thank you for reading my story! I will be updating it regularly and will work on new chapters after around Chapter 20! I didn't realize how much of the story I wrote and posted before taking it down a while back. If you have any questions or comment please don't hesitate to leave them here or on my tumblr page, anais117fics! Thanks again for your support.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

_2001: Katniss 19 Prim 20_

I've been spending a lot of time lately with my good friend Cinna. We met at school in one of the programs they had for students who either had a financial or educational need; mine was financial because of foster care. We became fast friends when we found out we lived only a few blocks from each other and somehow became inseparable.

One day while walking along 6th avenue in the East Village, we stopped in a music store to look at some cds. There was a really good song on and we found ourselves dancing and singing to the music, completely not caring about the other patrons who had to be looking at us goof off. Before we left we spontaneously applied for jobs there and to our surprise were called back for interviews where we were offered a job. This was going to be our summer job and also when I decided I would explore the city.

The manager there was easy enough to get along with, but the assistant manager was something else. Her name was Johanna Mason and all I can describe her personality as was a fireball. She got along with most people and the customers loved her. I even found myself staring at her at work, which turned out to be a little bit awkward.

"She's really nice," I told Cinna on the way home after one of our shifts.

"Yes, she is. She invited us over to her house this Friday for drinks. Do you think you'll go?" Cinna seems preoccupied with something in his book bag, but he still speaks to me while his head is down.

"Possibly. Are you?"

"No," he replies looking up at me. "There's something I need to tell you," he taps his finger on his bag looking more serious than I've ever seen him.

"Go ahead."

"I can't go because I have a date."

"Okay. Where did you meet the lucky girl?" I tease and Cinna blushes.

"It's not a girl," he pauses and then takes a breath. "I'm gay Katniss." Another pause as he looks at me waiting for my approval and after a grin spreads across my face I reach over and hug him.

"I knew it!" I try not to squeal and we both start laughing. Cinna had many girls who liked him and even had a steady special friend that I met, but I always thought something was different about him.

"So tell me about him," I inquire, and we spend the train ride home discussing the guy he met while walking around the village one evening after his shift.

With Cinna now dating someone he spends less time with me. It was something I had anticipated but I did miss our time together. Johanna noticed and started offering to hang out with me instead. At first I thought it might go against the rules of a manager hanging out with a subordinate, but she didn't seem to take that part of the job too seriously. One Friday night I closed with her and she invited me over to her house to hang out and drink a few beers. She had just turned 21 and wanted to enjoy being able to buy all the beer she once had to ask her mother to buy for her. They had an interesting relationship with Johanna working to help her take care of her two little brothers and little sister since the age of 14, so she was always treated like an adult.

We take the subway to her house and walk the few blocks to her apartment. When we arrive I walk in quietly and she leads me into her room. I take a seat on her bed and she disappears into the kitchen to get the beer. She comes back with a six pack of coronas and opens one for me and then her. Johanna sits now next to me on the bed and she turns on her stereo to a song from the _Gone in Sixty Seconds _soundtrack.

"This song reminds me of my best friend," she says tipping the bottle up and taking a drink.

_I've still got your face, painted on my heart, _

_scrawled upon my soul, etched upon my memory baby _

"How so," I ask turning to her.

"I was in love with her and she turned me down telling me she rather have our friendship instead of a relationship." I'm quiet for a minute while I process that she is basically the second person in how many weeks to tell me that they were gay.

"So you're a lesbian?" I ask slowly and she lets out a small laugh, but tries to cover it with her hand.

"I don't like labels Katniss. I fall in love with who I fall in love with. I don't go specifically looking for a particular sex, they just happen to be the ones I fall for." I nod, we continue drinking and soon after she's opening a second one. I'm not used to drinking so after two I'm feeling a strong buzz.

I feel the alcohol coursing through my body and I can't help but smile at her.

"What?" She asks grinning back at me.

"I don't know," I laugh. "I guess it's the beer."

"You're such a light weight," she teases setting her beer down. Suddenly she's looking at me with a look on her face I've never seen before.

"Are you seeing anyone?"

"No, I'm single," I answer.

"Oh, okay," and she bites her lip with a small smile on her face. There's something about the way she is smiling at me that highlights the dimple in her cheek and the fact that her eyes are light brown up close when you really look at them.

Later that night after listening to more music, Johanna calls a cab for me and I head home. I call her when I do so she knows I made it home safe. She seems happy that I took the time to call her tonight and she wishes me a good night, and I do the same. I quickly change my clothes in my hazy state and fall asleep with her on my mind.

My Friday nights look like this for some time; me hanging out with her alone or with her friends. I prefer when we're alone though because we can talk about our lives and we listen to music I've never heard before. I complement her on her taste of music and thank her for introducing me to it. Johanna seems different around her friends, especially her best friend who seems to have a new boyfriend every time I hang out with them.

During the rest of summer I visit Central Park and fall in love with all it has to offer. I find myself near the lake around 86th street, and Sheep's Meadow near 59th street. I go there sometimes with Cinna when he's not busy, but mostly I go with Johanna. I get my fix of being outside and hanging out with her. I feel like we're becoming good friends and it's a change with how my life used to be. In high school I had little to no friends, and I don't speak to any of the ones I did have currently.

The summer comes to a close and Cinna and I prepare for our sophomore year at school. We spend the day before our first day back shopping for new outfits and feeling carefree, but that feeling is short lived for us as our first day of school landed on September 11. It was a stressful day to say the least, especially when I finally got home. I spent the rest of the evening at Cinna's house too afraid to walk the few blocks back to my house. He was able to call his boyfriend and after his urging stayed home. I was admittedly glad he was there so that I wouldn't be alone.

My cell phone got very little service but I was able to call my foster mother to tell her I was okay. I even received a voicemail from Johanna who was on her way to work when the towers were hit. Thankfully she was able to get back to her house before the trains were stopped.

I felt my world changed after that event; I didn't feel like a young adult anymore. I felt like I needed to figure out my life and start working a full-time job with health benefits, and maybe take time off of school until I figure out what I wanted to do with my life. I wound up withdrawing from school in the next few weeks, and getting a second job at an overnight market research company in Manhattan, just a few blocks from where I was working.

"So you got a second job?" Johanna asks me as we sit on her bed drinking our coronas. This is the first time I had time to spend with her since we came back to work after the attacks. Business was nearly non-existent for a few weeks after and they only could only afford to have either her on staff or our boss.

"Yes. I want to move out of where I'm at now so I need to start saving. I feel like I need to be on my own already." Johanna nods as she inches closer to me as she sets her beer down.

"But then I won't get to hang out with you as much if you have to work overnight." I look over at her and she's making a pout.

"I'll see you." I say and Johanna rests her hand on my thigh and starts to draw circles.

"I hope so. You're one of my favorite people to hang out with."

I'm listening to her speak but I can't help but feel warmth radiating from the spot her fingers are tracing. My stomach does a flip when she draws her fingers closer up towards my stomach. It's interesting to be sitting here with a girl and she's doing something that is completely turning me on. I've never consciously like girls but with Johanna it just seems different. When she looks at me I feel like I'm the only one in the room despite originally feeling that it was just a side effect of her overwhelming personality.

"I like you Katniss," she reveals as she continues her ministrations.

"I think I like you too," I respond before realizing it and I smile at her. Johanna looks at me returning the smile and her hand moves from my leg to my face where she gently cups it. She leans in, plants a small kiss on my lips leaving me to feel a warm spark radiating from there and all over my body. I look into her eyes and they glisten; presumably from her intoxication and possibly lust. I lean back in capturing her lips and for the first time taste her sweet chap stick. It's different kissing a girl; for one their lips are softer and there's no stubble rubbing up against you.

Johanna opens her mouth and I slide my tongue in and she whimpers. The sound she makes further ignites the fire that is building in my stomach. I lead her over with my mouth to the head of the bed and we lay down, our lips still locked. Her hand goes to my braid and she runs her hand up and down the length of it, eliciting a moan from me. I find my hands in her dark locks as well, letting my fingers get lost. I'm starting to think that the beer isn't doing this to me, but that I'm really enjoying kissing her and somehow I feel this is the start of something new.

From that point on we continue to hang out, but when we are alone we wind up making out. I never thought I could like a girl but it seemed to have come natural with her. We keep things low key when we are at work and no one knows the wiser. I haven't even told Cinna what's going on between us since he quit the job shortly after 9/11. His current boyfriend invited him to live with him and since he's well off, he wanted Cinna to continue with school and graduate.

I started working at my overnight job at the end of September and so far I like it. I'm tired in the morning but the extra paycheck makes a huge different in my savings account. On one particular night I arrive early and encounter the 4-12pm supervisor. His name is Peeta Mellark and from what I've heard from the other employees he's a real hard ass with his workers. When he first started he had 10 people fired for not doing their work properly and from the sound of that I'm a little nervous to speak to him.

"Hi, I'm Peeta," he says to me holding out his hand.

"I'm Katniss," I give him my hand nervously.

"So you just started?"

"I did, about a month ago."

"How are you liking it so far?"

"It's okay. A little monotonous," I reply and he laughs.

"A common reaction, but it's okay." I smile nervously and from there we continue our small conversation. Despite how he makes me feel, I can't help but notice how deep blue his eyes are and the dimple that seems to appear when he smiles. Peeta seems nice enough, but I just chalk it up to the fact that I'm new.

"Well it was nice to meet you," he says rustling his hands through his blonde curls. He gets up and walks over to the overnight supervisor, Finnick and they began a discussion about work.

I begin to notice Peeta every time I come into work and he always gives me a smile, displaying his dimples. I don't know what it is about dimples, but usually they pull me in. I sit at my desk fantasizing; not about him in particular but dimples in general, when my phone buzzes. I look at it and it's a text message from Johanna asking me if I'm coming by in the morning after work. I reply and tell her that I am and that I miss her. She sends a sideways smiley face and that she misses me too. It's amazing what cellphones are doing now; I can send messages without having to call. I wonder what it will be like in 10 years from now.

The next morning I leave work and take the N train to the J train and finally the M train to her house. Despite being a few transfers, I get there in an hour. When I arrive at her house I send her a text message and she meets me at the door. I go into her room and notice that she's still in her sleep clothes when she closes the space between us and starts to kiss me.

"Well good morning," I say smoothing her hair behind her ears. I kick off my shoes and sit on her bed, my back facing the wall. Johanna walks on her knees and straddles me pulling my braid back hard and kissing me. I let out a light moan as she begins to nibble and kiss my lips. We continue on our usual make out session with my hands gingerly going under her shirt palming her breasts while her lips are over mine, my neck and shoulders. I continue teasing her nipples and she moans in my mouth, moving her hips over and over again in my lap.

Things heat up steadily and then I hear my phone begin to ring. I ignore it and continue with Johanna and hear the familiar tone of a voicemail alert. My hand drifts down and I manually stimulate her until she's bucking her hips into me and moaning louder than before. When she reaches her climax she falls onto me smiling and kissing the side of my face. I lay her down and face her, planting a kiss on her forehead before I turn over and check my phone. To my surprise the voicemail is from Gale. I haven't heard from him in months and I haven't done anything with him since the spring right before I started working with Johanna.

_Hey Catnip, just wanted to check in. I haven't spoken to you in a long time and I was wondering if you wanted to get together for a movie? Anyhow call me back. Later._

A movie, ha, I know what he wants but I'm honestly not interested. I'm not in a relationship per say with Johanna but I don't see more than one person at a time. I like what I have with her and for now it's enough.

Johanna reaches a hand over and across my belly, making low sounds as she touches me there. I lay my phone down and turn back over to her kissing her again and letting our first session lead into a second.

Before I know it, it's New Year's Eve and I'm sitting in Johanna's bedroom watching the ball drop. I quit the music store about a month ago so this is the only way I can see her. Her family is in the other rooms and have been coming in and out bringing us food and talking about their plans for the New Year. It's refreshing having a somewhat normal evening with a family that gets along. At my foster home there's always some tension and I rather not be there for it.

I'm off from work tonight but tomorrow night I'm back to my regular schedule. I have a meeting with my social worker later this week to discuss some developments with my case. I was informed that I've been approved for Section 8 housing so I'll be getting my own apartment soon. I'm excited for the prospect of having my own place and Johanna visiting me instead of me coming here all the time. I like it here, but we want privacy from time to time and eager siblings coming in and out sort of dampen the mood.

I called Gale a few weeks back, and we had a small lunch where I told him that I didn't want to see him in the context I had been. I wanted to remain friends but that was all; I didn't tell him about Johanna though because I didn't think he would understand.

As the ball drops and rings in 2002, I look over to Johanna bringing my lips to hers.

"Happy New Year," we say in unison and both smile. This year will definitely be different than all of the others.


End file.
